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A father carries pictures where his money used to be. ~Author Unknown
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There is still no cure for the common birthday. ~John Glenn
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It would seem that something which means poverty, disorder and violence every single day should be avoided entirely, but the desire to beget children is a natural urge. ~Phyllis Diller
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Inflation is when you pay fifteen dollars for the ten-dollar haircut you used to get for five dollars when you had hair. ~Sam Ewing
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The secret of staying young is to live honestly, eat slowly, and lie about your age. ~Lucille Ball
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Because time itself is like a spiral, something special happens on your birthday each year: The same energy that God invested in you at birth is present once again. ~Menachem Mendel Schneerson
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Thanks to modern medical advances such as antibiotics, nasal spray, and Diet Coke, it has become routine for people in the civilized world to pass the age of 40, sometimes more than once. ~Dave Barry, "Your Disintegrating Body," Dave Barry Turns 40, 1990
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Sherman made the terrible discovery that men make about their fathers sooner or later... that the man before him was not an aging father but a boy, a boy much like himself, a boy who grew up and had a child of his own and, as best he could, out of a sense of duty and, perhaps love, adopted a role called Being a Father so that his child would have something mythical and infinitely important: a Protector, who would keep a lid on all the chaotic and catastrophic possibilities of life. ~Tom Wolfe, The Bonfire of the Vanities
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It kills you to see them grow up. But I guess it would kill you quicker if they didn't. ~Barbara Kingsolver, Animal Dreams
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Youth is a disease from which we all recover. ~Dorothy Fulheim
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He didn't tell me how to live; he lived, and let me watch him do it. ~Clarence Budington Kelland
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When I was a boy of fourteen, my father was so ignorant I could hardly stand to have the old man around. But when I got to be twenty-one, I was astonished at how much he had learned in seven years. ~Author unknown, commonly attributed to Mark Twain but no evidence has yet been found for this (Thanks, Garson O'Toole!)
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Growing old is mandatory; growing up is optional. ~Chili Davis
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Thanks to modern medical advances such as antibiotics, nasal spray, and Diet Coke, it has become routine for people in the civilized world to pass the age of 40, sometimes more than once. ~Dave Barry, "Your Disintegrating Body," Dave Barry Turns 40, 1990
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Because time itself is like a spiral, something special happens on your birthday each year: The same energy that God invested in you at birth is present once again. ~Menachem Mendel Schneerson
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Life is a moderately good play with a badly written third act. ~Truman Capote
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It would seem that something which means poverty, disorder and violence every single day should be avoided entirely, but the desire to beget children is a natural urge. ~Phyllis Diller
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Making the decision to have a child is momentous. It is to decide forever to have your heart go walking around outside your body. ~Elizabeth Stone
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Time may be a great healer, but it's a lousy beautician. ~Author Unknown
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Fatherhood is pretending the present you love most is soap-on-a-rope. ~Bill Cosby
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One father is more than a hundred Schoolemasters. ~George Herbert, Outlandish Proverbs, 1640
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Youth is a wonderful thing. What a crime to waste it on children. ~George Bernard Shaw
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Thanks to modern medical advances such as antibiotics, nasal spray, and Diet Coke, it has become routine for people in the civilized world to pass the age of 40, sometimes more than once. ~Dave Barry, "Your Disintegrating Body," Dave Barry Turns 40, 1990
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Youth is a wonderful thing. What a crime to waste it on children. ~George Bernard Shaw
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Youth is a wonderful thing. What a crime to waste it on children. ~George Bernard Shaw
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Thanks to modern medical advances such as antibiotics, nasal spray, and Diet Coke, it has become routine for people in the civilized world to pass the age of 40, sometimes more than once. ~Dave Barry, "Your Disintegrating Body," Dave Barry Turns 40, 1990
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Never raise your hand to your kids. It leaves your groin unprotected. ~Red Buttons
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Time may be a great healer, but it's a lousy beautician. ~Author Unknown
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A father is always making his baby into a little woman. And when she is a woman he turns her back again. ~Enid Bagnold
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A diplomat is a man who always remembers a woman's birthday but never remembers her age. ~Robert Frost
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