Friday, December 30, 2011

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Blessed indeed is the man who hears many gentle voices call him father!  ~Lydia M. Child, Philothea: A Romance, 1836
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First you forget names; then you forget faces; then you forget to zip up your fly; and then you forget to unzip your fly.  ~Branch Rickey
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First you forget names; then you forget faces; then you forget to zip up your fly; and then you forget to unzip your fly.  ~Branch Rickey
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Sherman made the terrible discovery that men make about their fathers sooner or later... that the man before him was not an aging father but a boy, a boy much like himself, a boy who grew up and had a child of his own and, as best he could, out of a sense of duty and, perhaps love, adopted a role called Being a Father so that his child would have something mythical and infinitely important: a Protector, who would keep a lid on all the chaotic and catastrophic possibilities of life.  ~Tom Wolfe, The Bonfire of the Vanities
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Fatherhood is pretending the present you love most is soap-on-a-rope.  ~Bill Cosby

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    Never raise your hand to your kids.  It leaves your groin unprotected.  ~Red Buttons
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    Henry James once defined life as that predicament which precedes death, and certainly nobody owes you a debt of honor or gratitude for getting him into that predicament.  But a child does owe his father a debt, if Dad, having gotten him into this peck of trouble, takes off his coat and buckles down to the job of showing his son how best to crash through it.  ~Clarence Budington Kelland
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    A diplomat is a man who always remembers a woman's birthday but never remembers her age.  ~Robert Frost
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    Spread the diaper in the position of the diamond with you at bat.  Then fold second base down to home and set the baby on the pitcher's mound.  Put first base and third together, bring up home plate and pin the three together.  Of course, in case of rain, you gotta call the game and start all over again.  ~Jimmy Piersal, on how to diaper a baby, 1968
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    Life is a moderately good play with a badly written third act.  ~Truman Capote


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    Middle age is when your age starts to show around your middle.  ~Bob Hope
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    A father is always making his baby into a little woman.  And when she is a woman he turns her back again.  ~Enid Bagnold
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    Because time itself is like a spiral, something special happens on your birthday each year:  The same energy that God invested in you at birth is present once again.  ~Menachem Mendel Schneerson
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    Blessed indeed is the man who hears many gentle voices call him father!  ~Lydia M. Child, Philothea: A Romance, 1836
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    Wisdom doesn't necessarily come with age.  Sometimes age just shows up all by itself.  ~Tom Wilson
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    Never raise your hand to your kids.  It leaves your groin unprotected.  ~Red Buttons
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    The secret of staying young is to live honestly, eat slowly, and lie about your age.  ~Lucille Ball
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    A birthday is just the first day of another 365-day journey around the sun.  Enjoy the trip.  ~Author Unknown
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    Middle age is when your age starts to show around your middle.  ~Bob Hope
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    When I was a boy of fourteen, my father was so ignorant I could hardly stand to have the old man around.  But when I got to be twenty-one, I was astonished at how much he had learned in seven years.  ~Author unknown, commonly attributed to Mark Twain but no evidence has yet been found for this (Thanks, Garson O'Toole!)
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    Growing old is mandatory; growing up is optional.  ~Chili Davis
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    Wisdom doesn't necessarily come with age.  Sometimes age just shows up all by itself.  ~Tom Wilson
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    Dad, you're someone to look up to no matter how tall I've grown.  ~Author Unknown
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    Time may be a great healer, but it's a lousy beautician.  ~Author Unknown
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    Are we not like two volumes of one book?  ~Marceline Desbordes-Valmore


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    Birthdays are good for you.  Statistics show that the people who have the most live the longest.  ~Larry Lorenzoni
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    Youth is a wonderful thing.  What a crime to waste it on children.  ~George Bernard Shaw
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    Growing old is mandatory; growing up is optional.  ~Chili Davis
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    It is not flesh and blood but the heart which makes us fathers and sons.  ~Johann Schiller
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    We know we're getting old when the only thing we want for our birthday is not to be reminded of it.  ~Author Unknown


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